My weekend wasn't much better. For the past couple of weeks my back has been bothering me, but Thursday night/Friday was like nothing I've ever dealt with before. I couldn't lay down. After several hours of trying everything I could think of, I took T3 and was able to sleep for a couple of hours. The episode has slowly been wearing off since yesterday morning.
This whole thing brought about a bit of an epiphany. We have focused for so long ( over a year) on the surgery on my left knee, but, while this may improve my mobility a bit, it isn't really going to solve my problems or change my life dramatically. I spent most of the weekend "navel gazing" and thinking about this. I've decided to stop worrying about the future, and, taking a leaf from your book, Beth, live one day at a time, finding what joy I can within that day, and the people who touch my life.
As is my habit, when making a life change, I had to find a ritual,to mark a transition into the new. I went to the internet and found the pattern for that little owl, that we talked about last week. I finished her yesterday and named her Joy, as my search will be for "joy", from now on. So, now we are verbally stating a purpose or goal for everyday, and what we do outside of that goal will be an active choice, and not a "this must get done" because of some outside influence. Obviously, this had to be a mutual agreement, between the two of us. It worked well yesterday, using a stated mutual goal of taking a load to the thrift store. Today we plan to cover a large piece of pressboard with construction plastic, so that I can use it as a work surface in the studio.
And here is my little "Joy". Pattern available on request.
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